Character is a hard thing to define. Yet, most of us know that having good character is something we want and want in the people we surround ourselves with. There are many telltale signs and indicators of not only our own character, but someone else’s. Maya Angelou said, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” It would seem quite simple, but it is easy to not see what is in front of you. We also have to remember that we can project our own issues onto someone and have the story we tell ourselves be our perceived truth, rather than the actual truth. But something occurred recently that gave me pause to really think about this subject.
If someone is repeatedly accusing you of doing, saying or thinking something that is negative, inflammatory, and frankly something you wouldn’t even think about doing/saying/thinking, then you have been given a red flag. Because the fact of the matter is, they did think of it. They did believe it. They did do it. So they think you did/say/think the same thing. Maybe it was just done to them, but they are demonstrating issues of distrust. They are showing you that their “go to” is negative and that they are quick to believe the worst.
While this might not be the worst character flaw in a list of flaws, it is one of the most important ones to me. I want to surround myself with people who believe the best in others. People who choose to be kind and choose to have grace. This might seem contradictory to what I said in the beginning, but I view it in a different light. While we should want to have grace and acceptance for people, we also have to learn to differentiate between someone who is good, makes mistakes and is remorseful. Good people do bad things, but they learn from them. But when a person is just repeatedly unkind and is always thinking the worst of you, there is a lot more going on here. You have to decide you want to be a part of that. Lack of kindness is ugly.
Red Eye
Be kind.
It’s that simple.
